WISHES FOR THE HEART

2010-12-21T08:12:00.000-08:00

I am frozen with uncertainty not knowing which way to move, forward or backwards, to the left or to the right, in a song with no lyrics. Fear, suspicions and doubt rob my harmony. I breathe deep, then deeper, and then I breathe again. I follow the soft flow of my breath as I inhale and exhale noticing the steady rhythm that calms me. It is there in this perfect exchange of give and take that life reminds me to give out exactly what I wish to take in. If I proceed with hostility, judgment and resentment then it is hostility, judgment and resentment that will find me. If I proceed with love, trust, and gratitude then it is love, trust and gratitude that will find me. Therefore, I write the lyrics to the song I wish to sing. I create the harmony and rhythm in my life and I precede giving out exactly what I seek to take in. Like the perfect breath that sustains you, I wish for you the song you wish to sing.

2010-11-16T14:53:00.001-08:00

There are many complementing me, like a rich vine of wisteria climbing the bark of a spruce. And then, there are the few bold and pronounced that come marking their presence by making a difference; influencing my decisions, challenging my thoughts, affecting the direction of my course. With them, I am left to ponder the profound notion that they came for a reason, that it was all meant to be, a spiritual harmony so beautiful in sound I cannot deny its music. You have come to my life making a difference, composing our amity with spiritual notes. I dare, I open, and I accept it as truth that was meant to be. Therefore, I accept that you have been here from my beginning and you will be with me in my eternity. You are in my tear drops and in my trembling hands, you are in my laughter and my arms when I hold those I love. You are in the spirit that nourishes my soul. For you, I wish to make a difference.

2010-10-18T17:14:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish the Courage to Breathe, Believe and Recieve
I hid in her shadow safe to participate unnoticed while devouring the wisdom I so desperately craved. Remaining child, protégé, I avoided expectations and accountability. Then, one day, the sun changed course and the silhouette that protected me faded before my eyes. I chased her tripping over insecurities frighten by realizations I was not ready to accept when the delicate voice of another spoke, "Breathe, believe, receive." An epiphany woke me from personal slumber as I repeated,” breathe, believe, receive.” Breathe, I can do that, slow the breath to allow the scope of my eyes to widen, my mind to calm. But now to believe; do I dare strip the coat of self doubt from my armor that allows me to remain complacent? I breathe again, this time feeling a wind of love and encouragement so strong against my back I begin to believe. Yes, I can breathe and believe but am I able to receive. I turn to the sun that betrayed me feeling its warmth on my face appreciating its call for self growth. And once more, I breathe, I believe and I begin a new day open to receive. For you, I wish the courage to breathe, believe and receive all that you are meant to be.

2010-09-13T05:25:00.001-07:00

I wish I could explain loneliness and why we feel anxiety, give you an answer for why we lash out at those we love and why we feel hurt sometimes. I wish I had an answer for why we can see our lives are full but we still have bouts of emptiness and why we can feel lonely in a room full of people. I wish I could make it all better before it even starts to hurt, but I can’t. So I wish for you to know that feelings of failure and inadequacy are part of the walk. I wish for you to know you are more like everyone else than you know. Your thoughts, your fears, your realizations are all okay. I wish for you to see how beautiful you are and realize your value lies within your heart. And in time, it will be your heart that shows you all I wish for you. This is your walk and I wish for you to know I am always walking with you. For you, I wish a beautiful walk.

2010-08-25T10:54:00.001-07:00

I watched him from afar, taken by his grace and beauty. He appeared unaffected by my presence and continued as if putting on a show for all that would be his audience. He did not fly, he soared, he dove and he guided unquestionablely aware of his gorgeous surroundings. I envied him so free floating through the sky as gravity held me steadfast to the ground. I cannot tell you what species of bird he was just that he was mesmerizing to watch. I tried to imagine the world through his eyes, watching it all from afar. I wondered what I could gain with the opportunity to view my world from a far. Here I stood, feet to the ground engrossed in my life, caught up in my personal injuries, held captive by my viewpoint… I ventured and flew high above the trees leaving self thought behind. Now I can see my immediate world and those who share it. I see their lives and how I fit into them. I watch them interact; I bear witness to their fears and joys. I experience their anxieties and triumphs… I fly yet higher with the birds above the town, no fences separate, no walls divide, one man’s yard unites to another. I can see buildings of worship and government but I am too high above to recognize exclusion. The world is big. Man moves but I cannot see prejudice, or hatred… I dare fly higher to the Milky Way and the world below me becomes a magnificent blend of beautiful color, blues and greens, whites and browns. The air is thin but clean and crisp. I begin to question a different purpose and appreciation, not just for my existence, but for all that breathe the air below me. I better understand I am one in the world and the world is one… I dare not fly higher for I am not prepared to conceive what it offers… I float. I soar from this view from afar, now saturated and satisfied with my new interpretations of our vast world and all who inhabit it. For you, I wish a bird’s eye view.

2010-08-18T20:21:00.001-07:00

You wilt like a flower, fold to the floor. I offer you my arms to hold, my shoulders to lean against. I hear you think. See you from miles away. Your guests have left your party but I remain. You laugh and I laugh, you hurt and I hurt. You falter but I see reason, you blunder but I see growth. And you know what is meant by “we are not born with all of our sisters.” I wilt like a flower, fold to the floor. You offer me your arms to hold, your shoulders to lean against. You hear me think. You see me from miles away. My guests have left my party but you remain. I laugh, you laugh, I hurt and you hurt. I falter but you see reason, I blunder but you see growth. And I know what is meant by “we are not born with all of our sisters.” We grew with different walls, walked different halls but we found each other along the way; a best friend worthy of family, a best friend simply worthy. Find comfort in my trust, release your anxiety to my loyalty. If you hunger I will feed you, if you fall ill I will nurse you. My home is your home, my family your family. You are the keeper of my secrets and I of yours. A sister, a hand to pull you up when you fall, a hand to shelter you as you grow old, a hand always there to hold…We found each other along the way and to the end we will walk. Now we know what is meant by “we are not born with all of our sisters.” I wish for you what is meant to be a sister. I wish for you, my sister, to call me sister.

Today's Wish quote

2010-07-30T09:33:00.001-07:00

For You, I Wish Self Love
It patiently awaits you like spring yearning to birth through a winter’s frost. It has always been there and always will be. The fortunate will discover it quickly but others may resist it feeling undeserving, some may go a lifetime in absence of its glory. Nevertheless, it is there within us all. A time, a moment, when we simply let go and love ourselves. We forgive our faults, accept our limitations and stop looking for inadequacies within. A realization that makes self doubt appear uninteresting, almost indulgent as we recognize we are worthy of the same respect we give others. This moment may come to you in beauty like a morning bird waking the forest with song. Yet, it may come in thunder when you desperately need love and the only one capable of delivering it is you. Allow the moment, know it is waiting. No matter how long or harsh the winter blows spring always appears. Believe that within you, no matter how harsh your self-doubt, lies a spring of self love yearning to birth. For you, I wish self love.

Today's Wish

2010-07-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish Honor
I sat off to the side waiting, a woman next to me fumbled through her bag. The sounds of a father trying to calm his child competed with the typical hustle and bustle hums of the airport on a Tuesday afternoon. My eye caught notice of three women hurrying from window to window, anxiously awaiting the arrival of an aircraft. Obviously sisters, they giggled and pointed as the welcoming signs they made pressed against the window. Repeatedly, they asked one another, “Do you see her, do you see her?” Their excitement was enduring. I wondered curiously, was it a fourth sister they awaited? Their mother? But it became apparent that one of the women had more at stake than the other two. She bit her nails, wrapped her arms around her stomach and paced at a feverish rate, her daughter, maybe returning from college, maybe on the eve of her wedding? As their plane arrived, I noticed I was not the only one in the waiting area giving them an audience, many of us watched with anticipation. One by one, men and women, boy and girls deplaned. Finally, a flight attendant reached the area and assured them, “She is on her way.” The mother’s expression mystified me, tears swelling in her eyes as she cupped her face with her shaking hands, but then it became clear. Her daughter appeared. She was beautiful, a child in her late teens, maybe early twenties, with long strawberry blonde hair and a face covered in freckles. Her uniform, shades of green and brown that are only worn by the U.S. Military. She dropped her gear as she reached out and buried her face in the chest of her mother. The waiting area burst in applause. The older gentlemen went first, but immediately, one by one, the waiting room stood. Tears flowed down many faces as this brave young solider desperately tried to stay strong. Someone yelled, “It’s okay, soldiers cry too,” and her body shook with emotion. A feeling of oneness, of unity, swept through the room as we all paid tribute to the example of courage and sacrifice before us. The applause held steady as they released their embrace but what happened next, I will remember for the rest of my life … The young woman who risked her life for us and whose mind now holds unfathomable memories walked straight through the crowd. She never once stopped and asked anything of me or anyone else, she asked for nothing in return. I wish for you, the depth of this soldier’s, and all those in service, honor.

Today's Wish

2010-06-30T07:46:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish Your Way
I anger you; you flail your arms, gulp water as you struggle to stay afloat. You see me standing on the ocean’s edge, holding the life preserver that has saved you so many times before. I watch the current pull you farther from safety. You reach your arms to me, but I remain still. You must move now, I can no longer hold you up, so hold my words close. Remain alert, the waters can change at any time. Swim with the current as much as possible and let its energy move you. When it gets choppy, swim harder; when you are too tired to swim another stroke, swim your hardest. When you hit a rip tide, stay calm. Watch out for sharks and barracudas. Your heart pounds and you tread water, not moving from your place. But rest assured the ocean is grand and full of beauty. It can take you around the world and back. The salt of its waters will heal your wounds and the fish from its core will nourish your body. If you trust and relax, you will float much of your journey, you will see an array of beauty in color and form. Remember to swim like the dolphins jumping through the air, glide like a sea turtle, dream like a mermaid. Over the years, spend time in a school of fish, swim solo like a beluga whale. You see me standing on the water’s edge holding a life preserver and you are confused as to why I do not toss it your way. Know my arms tremble in resistance. You are frightened and so am I. I yearn to swallow the seven seas so you can walk to safety; I yearn to battle every creature known to the ocean’s water. I must let you go now and wish you your way, but of all my words, hold these words closest: I stand apart from you now, watching from the ocean’s edge, but I am prepared, and if you lose your way, I will swim around the globe in hunt for you. This I promise.

For you, I Wish The Strength to Love

2010-06-20T13:29:00.000-07:00

I want to wish you something, but I am too exhausted to tend my own needs, much less the needs of others. I feel as if I have given myself close to depletion in the absence of appreciation. I sit here with my pen, yet no words come to mind. Why then, if I feel so drained, do I feel such a need to reach out and wish for you tonight? I have read that both the receiver and the giver of acts of kindness benefit equally. Maybe my needs are self-serving. I try hard to get to a place in my life where I give without expectations or needing anything in return. True giving must come unconditionally. Tonight, I relapse. Therefore, I look to nature, one of our greatest teachers. I wonder if the ocean ever says, “I don’t want to make waves today or provide food and oxygen for the marine world.” Does she tire? And the sun, does he ever complain about shining? No matter where you are, what continent, country or town, if you are sitting on the beach or walking through a forest the sun is there. He does not care if you are young or old, rich or poor, black or white. You do not even have to be ethical and he will still shine on you. As you look directly to the sun, you feel a direct relationship, a beam of heat and light connecting you to him. He makes you feel as if for that moment, you are the only living thing on this earth he is caring for. His warmth surrounds you and you forget that hundreds of miles away, a cornfield is being nourished by his giving, and another hundred miles away, a child in the ghetto is being warmed. That is how I want to love. Tonight, when I seek love, I want the strength and goodness to love; so all those around me feel as if they are the only person on this earth I love at that moment. I am tired and have little poetry for you, but I have a wish for you. I wish you all my love and I wish you the strength to love all with all of your love. Some days, it is all we have to give, and everyday it is all we really need.

2010-06-19T14:13:00.000-07:00

We would like to extend a Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there wishing you a wonderful day!

Today's Wish

2010-06-14T10:47:00.000-07:00

For you, I Wish an Understanding of Anger
Have I told you I lost another loved one? She has been stolen like most of the others by an illness that sneaks into our lives, alters our perceptions, fills us with mistrust and suspicion. We think no one sees it, but we are fooled; you cannot hide it’s grand presence. We catch this illness as we catch most illnesses, our defenses are down, our immunities weak, and we are exposed to hazardous elements of our environment. This illness I speak of I call, “Anger.” I know anger as most of us do, she has blinded me many times, hindered my creativity, impeded my love…I contemplated anger, sat in thought with this force that rules so much of the living world. Lost for answers, I called on Anger herself to sit with me. She came willingly, much smaller in size than I expected and almost frail in appearance. She sat directly across from me staring through me. Her intimidation reached for my soul. My heart pounded, my palms sweated. It is hard to confront anger, it takes courage and risk but I was determined. I spoke, “Anger, why, why do you come into our lives and rob us of ourselves?” She stared and stared offering no answers as if unaware of her tremendous devastation. I had come this far, she would not scare me away this time. So I stared back. Surprisingly, I saw a tear swell up in her eye. I did not move, but repeated myself, “why anger, why do you come into our lives and rob us of ourselves?” Now the tears flowed and the faster they came the more lost I felt as to how to respond to this force. I spoke slowly, more frightened than I have ever been in my life, “Anger, I love you.” With that she broke, she wept and wept with her own need to be understood, not feared, her own need for respect. Her vulnerability moved me from my chair and as I embraced her. She remained still in my arms. It will take more love than this to gain her trust. She left quietly and as I watched her go I knew I would see her again. I will see her in myself and most of those I love. She will visit more often with some, and more intensely with others. But I learned something from her today. If I embrace her with love and dignity, allow her the time she needs, she will leave with fewer scars and little destruction. I wish this for you today, my loved one, I wish for you to understand your anger, hold her, love her and then let her go in peace.

For You, I Wish A Peaceful Night’s Sleep

2010-06-07T11:34:00.001-07:00

Mother of a soldier boy, do you know where your child sleeps tonight? Does he eat from a can? Does he nap in ditches? Mother of a soldier boy, do you fear a stranger at your door? Does the sound of bagpipes panic you? Mother of a soldier boy, can you remember his smile, his laughter, the twinkle in his eyes? Tell me, do so you walk to his closet to smell his clothes? Do you curl up like a baby and cry on his bed? Mother of a soldier boy, my boy sleeps safely in a room next to mine; I see his smile and hear his laughter every day. I smell the clothes on his back and I curl on his bed reading him a story. Mother of a soldier boy, does this upset you? Does it feel unfair? Mother of a soldier boy, my son walks in your son's honor, he breathes in your son’s sacrifice, he grows in your son's dignity and courage. I bow to you, I salute you. I cannot see the color of your skin, I cannot hear the words of your politicians, all I see is your bleeding heart. Mother of a soldier boy, rest your head against your pillow, dream in colors, wake in peace. Tonight, let me watch the door, let me guard the phone. Place your fears on the bedside next to you, let the mothers of the universe hold your son in their thoughts tonight. Mother of a soldier boy, I wish you a peaceful sleep.

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-30T12:48:00.001-07:00

Today, I wish for you, The Love of Friendship

I sit at my desk, many nights alone with the silence of my home, the occasional sounds of a cat meowing, an appliance humming. Words come to me as if they know where they belong before I do but tonight I am lost. I am lost because I know you are hurting, your heart has been broken and I cannot mend you. I would write you a lullaby if it would help you sleep, but I know your grieving mind does not rest. I would write you a sonnet if it would help you heal, but I know you must walk with your pain for now. As I sit here lost on how to help you, what to wish you, I reach my hand across the miles to take yours in mine, reminding you that you are not alone. As the beating of your heart pounds within your chest, the opening of your eyes blinds with the morning sun you are reminded that no force is greater than the human emotion of love. Love has broken your heart but it is love that will restore it. We are granted romantic love to unite us and bless us with life yet we are shattered when that love goes awry. Look around you and you will see a different love, a love that comes in friendship to hold you, and watch over you. This love too, is a gift. Open it, let those around you nurture you, be free to be weak, show your vulnerability, cry. Your world is beautiful and when the heart is hurting much can be seen. An exposed heart appreciates that which is oblivious to the secured. Be deep in your pain now but find the gift life offers you both in love and insight. Deep in the abyss of your sadness lies the treasure of human kindness waiting for your taking. Wrap it around you, let it warm you, let it rock you to your dreams….I sit here tonight lost with how to mend you but I wish you love, the love that comes in friendships and you, my friend, are so blessed with so much.

2010-05-24T17:56:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish Your Eternal Mother

The rhythm of her heart soothed you long before you took your first breath of air. Her arms cradled you, her kisses smothered you. She held your hand, tied your shoes, brushed your hair. When you were scared she reassured you, when you were sad she comforted you. She knew you better than you knew yourself. She is your mother. Tonight you are asked to say goodbye to her, a quest too grand to comprehend. We are never ready to say goodbye to our mothers regardless of age, for we are all the child looking up into her eyes when it is time to depart. She cannot hold you now; she cannot nurture your bleeding heart or wipe the tears from you swollen eyes. Mother Nature knew we would all have to say goodbye to our mothers one day and that this departure would redefine our being and leave us hallow inside, so she gifted all of her children with maternal love. Maternal love to share with one another when a mother must go. Your mother has wrapped her arms around many others in times of grief and heartache; now let them wrap their arms around you. Find your mother’s love in all who love you. See her eyes twinkle through a baby’s smile, feel her wisdom in a friend’s devotion. In a field of daisies rest your voice and look to the sky, remember the smell of her skin, the softness in her touch. The way her kiss took away the pain of a scrapped knee, the way her voice centered your world. As you feel her so close to you let the rhythm of her heart soothe you once more and you will come to realize that you started off as one and became two. Now you are one again, this time it is she who lays within you, for she will forever be in your heart.

Words by Barbara: A Tribute to Another Mother Gone Too Soon, Joyce Winters

2010-05-16T21:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I watched solemnly as they came to carry away my friend Joyce. Did they know how much we will all miss her? Did they know how her young son Logan, still part boy at 15, certainly not yet a man, would still need her, and she would not be there to answer his questions, cook his dinner, laugh with him, hug him, kiss him goodbye when she dropped him off at school, or welcome him home? Did they know how quiet he can be at times, how although he is a big guy for his age, he is still so vulnerable, sweet, unsure at times, and often cannot express his deeper feelings?
Did they know how Joyce would not be there to cheer him on when playing baseball, help him with his homework, or congratulate him on a job well done at school, or just marvel at his smile, and his adorably ackward ways? Where would his mom be when he found first love, went off to college, got his first "perfect" job, married, had children of his own, Joyce's grandchildren?
They did not know; but they were careful, respectful, as they lifted her now wasted body from the bed to the gurney, they had done this procedure far too many times before, it was routine, but they were careful to not make the moment appear too commonplace.
Did they know that she was once a genuine beauty, a woman so stunning men and women alike would turn as she entered a room? Her mother, 88 years of age, told me that as they left, and I concurred. I had often seen the reaction as Joyce entered a room, I had witnessed the heads turning. What is the sense of this, when a mother has to watch her lovely daughter diminish and die. None.

Someone said, "We are born between the loins of a woman, and we die in the arms of a woman." So true.

We know we will remember you Joyce: your beauty, your grace, your laughter, your love, your devotion to your husband John, and especially your deep love and concern for Logan. As mothers we have promised you that we will watch him as he grows, mother him, protect him, guide him, love him, and we will. It is our promise to you Joyce, we honor you. Always.
With love and respect for a battle fought with valor and optimism, your friend Barbara

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-13T10:59:00.000-07:00

"No matter how long or harsh the winter blows spring always appears. Believe that within you, no matter how harsh your self-doubt, lies a spring of self love yearning to birth."

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

MY LETTER TO ELLIE WHEN I GAVE HER THE PHOTOS OF THE TULIPS FROM MY GARDEN.

Dear Ellie,

I am not sure you if you know the story behind the tulips so I will tell it to you.

Last fall when Barbara called to tell me your cancer was back I went outside and planted 100 tulip bulbs in the ground outside my home. I told Barbara that the spring would eventually come and the tulips would blossom and your mother will be here to see them. The winter came bringing dreadful cold weather, it is amazing that anything can survive beneath the ground. But soon the skies warmed and the ground softened and the first little green bud showed its head followed by others. We waited in anticipation to see what color would dance for us first. I really thought it would be yellow, but being that Barbara is your daughter, the first tulip to blossom was purple. Soon they all opened up and turned my garden into a rainbow of color and love.

These are your Tulips; “Ellie’s Tulips” that will bloom again and again, and I will photograph them to share again and again.

Now we have Barbara’s Roses, and Ellie’s Tulips, how fantastic!

I wish you the most wonderful Mother’s Day ever!!!

Love, Tricia

Interview with Leeza Gibbons, Part 2

2010-05-09T19:02:00.000-07:00

http://leezagibbons.com/slices/media/RadioInterviewwithWishesAuthors2.html

Words and Actions by Barbara

2010-05-09T18:42:00.000-07:00

"God could not be everywhere so He created mothers"- Talmud

Every year I spend Mother's Day both working and celebrating at my restaurant Spago in Beverly Hills. Happily the restaurant is filled with mothers, grandmothers, great-grandmothers, daughters, granddaughters, women friends, aunts, cousins and all arrangements of male family and friends celebrating the women in their lives. I brought my extraordinary mom who has been valiantly battling lung cancer, my younger son Byron, (my elder son Cameron is away at college in the midst of his finals), my dear friend Eleanor who I introduced to my mom a few years ago, (at 84 they are both feisty, intelligent, creative,and sharply funny women). Eleanor recently experienced surgery for breast cancer, chemo for hairy cell leukemia, and a near fatal aortic tear, all in the same year. Also at the festivities was my longtime adorable beau John, my best male buddy David, (who is jokingly referred to by my mom as her son-in-law), and my brother Dan who celebrated his birthday today as well.
My weeks are always frenetic; as women we all often have far too much to do in a limited amount of time. I never seem to finish my to-do list, then again I no longer chastise myself, (well perhaps a bit), knowing when I compose one that there is often more on it than even womanly possible! The days prior to Mother's Day are especially frantic for me. I spend a great deal of time thinking of the OTHER mother's in my life. My friend Stacy also celebrates a May 9th birthday and is a mother of three, my friend Joyce is sadly extremely ill with cancer, as are two other friends. I spent Saturday traveling from home to home delivering food, gifts, company and support. I was exhausted, but it was actually the best gift I could have given myself! I could feel the love returned ten-fold and I knew that these moments would matter, to the friends, their families, and to ME...they would form memories I would cherish always. I spent the end of the evening, (until three a.m.), reading eighty book reviews so that I could place 20 books on my mom's new Kindle, she was thrilled with her gift of reading. This morning I cut roses from my garden and made arrangements for my mom and Eleanor which they could take home. I wrapped gifts for them and my brother, ( I have ribbon that I have printed with personal messages on it), and loaded the car with Byron and John's gentlemanly aid. There were wonderful chocolates for all the guests at my table and more for the ladies at the restaurant who work so hard on Mother's Day; my dear friend Hasty of Madame Chocolate made such delicious treats.
Today the restaurant was humming from early on. I saw so many friends, and met so many new ones; I signed a great many Wishes For A Mother's Heart books, kissed a lot of women, hugged some others, and sat with one women who was crying in the ladies room. She was extremely upset by something her husband had said. Two of her five daughters were in the laides room with her. I waited for bit, wiped down the counter, (I designed the restaurant, and I like it to look good, but I was also quietly listening). Nothing the girls seem to say was soothing their mom. I took a chance an sat down next to her on one of the five or so chairs we line up in the room. I took her hand and said, "We seem to be about the same age, I'm sure we have a lot in common. Your daughters obviously love you very much, (I found out later there were three more at the table outside); you're are such a beautiful woman, you have healthy girls, you seem, and I hope are, well yourself. This is YOUR day, nothing anyone says to you can affect you if YOU decide to not allow it in. If you decide to be happy and savor this day and the people who love you and care about you you will be happy, you will feel blessed, you will be able to let the toxic people and situations fall away from you". I could tell the daughters were initially surprised that a "stranger" would intervene, and it could have gone all wrong, even with the best of intentions; but intuitively I knew it would go well, I was speaking from a genuine place, and when we truly extend ourselves with kindness and care, the warmth will almost always be understood and received. I wish you all a wonderful Mother's Day today, and every day.
Page 57 of Wishes for A Mother's Heart; "The next time you find yourself about to say, 'Let me know if I can be of help', stop, reflect, and truly extend yourself by spontanteously doing just that; Act! Remember the precept,'The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.'"
Tricia, thank you for the gorgeous Tulip cards you sent my mother, she was overwhelmed by your love, their beauty and yours. You may have missed one of your callings! "The Green Thumb Photographer". I have asked Tricia to share the story of Ellie's Tulips with you; you will adore her story when she relates it tomorrow.

From a friend in England the classic Mother's Day poem:

God's Masterpiece Is Mother

God took the fragrance of a flower…
The majesty of a tree…
The gentleness of morning dew…
The calm of a quiet sea…
The beauty of the twilight hour…
The soul of a starry night…
The laughter of a rippling brook…
The grace of a bird in flight…
Then God fashioned from these things
A creation like no other,
And when his masterpiece was through
He called it simply – 'Mother'

Interview with Leeza Gibbons, Part 2

2010-05-09T18:30:00.000-07:00

http://leezagibbons.com/slices/media/RadioInterviewwithWishesAuthors1.html

2010-05-08T19:12:00.000-07:00

Interview with Leeza Gibbons, Part 1

Barbara and I met with Leeza last week to talk about Wishes on Leeza's radio show, Hollywood Confidential. We had a lot of fun and I learned to keep my feet on the ground regardless if it is radio. Enjoy! Tricia
http://leezagibbons.com/slices/media/RadioInterviewwithWishesAuthors1.html

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-07T21:07:00.000-07:00

"Let the words of those who love you be your soil and nourish your soul, let their compassion be your rain and quench your thirst for love, let their laughter be your sun and warm your heart. Allow yourself to need and be needed."

Words and Actions by Barbara

2010-05-06T23:07:00.000-07:00

"We strive to give our children a feeling of place in the world by grounding them with home and family; a heritage of belonging. If we have done a fine job, one day they will soar off and find a place of belonging wherever life may take them; because they carry home in their heart."

Happy Mother's Day to all the mother's who will always represent "home" in the hearts of their children.

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-04T18:44:00.000-07:00

"I must trust you now to take good care of my most precious treasure, my child, yourself. Take the oar, meander your journey cautiously with excitement and adventure and when you hit a scary turn know I am always with you."

Today's Wish quote

2010-05-01T22:50:00.000-07:00

"If this Mother's Day I could give you anything I would wrap your fears and your tears and hold them far from your reach. I would give you enough loyalty to erase your betrayals and any sadness resting in your heart. This Mother's Day I will wrap you a gift, but “I love you” is what I mean to give."

2010-04-28T07:09:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish the Lessons of Boyhood

So the day has come when they call you a man, when all you have known is to be a boy. So how do you know how to be a man? By remembering everything you learned being a boy. If one person on the team breaks the rules, the game is ruined for the whole team. The go-cart you built in your garage with your best friend is a much sweeter ride than any you can buy at the store. The only time you should be in a box is when you are rolling down a hill. Climb the corporate ladder like you climbed a tree, never looking back or letting fear get in your way while avoiding the sap. Remember what you learned being a boy. Things that make your heart pound are worth doing twice. If it smells bad, it probably is bad. The best place to find safety in times of trouble is in a pair of arms. And like a game of tennis, it is better to serve than to be served. Life will flash like summer vacation; get to the beach, find love in a book, and visit with friends. Never forget what you learned being a boy when becoming a man, remembering the most important lesson of all: your legs will carry you on your journey, but your family will carry you on their backs.

Tricia LaVoice

Words and Actions by Barbara

2010-04-24T17:02:00.000-07:00

Leeza's meaningful quote is profoundly true if we consider the saying;
"MAN PLANS AND GOD LAUGHS"; OR MORE GENTLY STATED, "GOD MANAGES."

I was wondering where this proverb originated. I was raised Jewish,(respecting all peaceful belief systems); my first inquiry was the bible, and not surprisingly found the reference there as: "Man plans, and Man proposes; God disposes. Man freely devises; God powerfully directs. Man willingly plans; God masterfully dictates. The commentary was, Man acts as he pleases; there is no "perfect" anything, so don't look for it.

The bible and commentary continued with, "We live in a sinful world; everything is imperfect. God has not revealed perfect choices for us. You will waste your life searching; and you will always be frustrated."

I was speaking with my Christian friends and asked about original sin;(as Jews we don't believe in the concept of original sin); we concurred however that although Christians do embrace this concept and Jews do not, we generally all believe we are born into a world that can constantly be improved upon. There is much work to done, and we must all participate in the healing of our world.

As Leeza offers:
"Life is most profound when we can give up the need to know what happens, the need to have an answer, or even to form the perfect questions."

I believe she is speaking of the beauty and exuberant place of being in the moment, of genuinely experiencing spontaneity. I do not believe that she is suggesting that we live every aspect of our lives without planning, without conscious forethought about our present or future; or without reflection about how our past has impacted our path moving forward. I know Leeza as a savvy businesswoman, a devoted mother, a successful entertainer; a thinker, planner, and a highly evolved woman of mindful living. I feel that what Leeza is trying to convey is that some of the deepest, most powerful and life changing moments happen when we simply allow life to unfurl its long, graceful arms and broadly reveal its mysteries. Some of those moments may not always be the happiest, others may be touchingly sad; others may be epiphanies of self-knowledge,(not all pleasant), or acceptance and overflowing gifts of love and respect. Whatever they may be, they were not planned, nor expected, and they perhaps could never have been negotiated to transpire even if we assertively tried. They just come to be: circumstance, or kismet, connections, or prior preparation that just allows this flow of energy, recognition, opportunity to wash over you if you can be open to it all. Give permission to yourself to accept it, embrace it, and feel gratitude.

As the bible says;
"Nothing is perfect", if that is so, and I believe that completely, then there cannot be any perfect questions, nor perfect answers. We must proceed with good will, kindness, and a desire to be the best we can for ourselves and for others. Expect surprises along the way. We can try to live meaningful, and happy lives of purpose; we cannot know for certain what will happen. We can hope for the best, and strive with earnestness and integrity to positively affect the outcome. However, we have no control over earthquakes, tsunamis and often even the complexities of the fickle heart. Plan but be flexible. Plan but know as human beings we must be prepared for sometimes finding profound light in the darkness moments; and when we are blessed with sunshine, share it, for those are the most profound moments of being alive.

Today's Wish Quote

2010-04-24T10:10:00.001-07:00

"Life is most profound when we can give up the need to know what happens, the need to have an answer, or even to form the perfect questions." Leeza Gibbons

Today's Wish Quote

2010-04-24T10:10:00.000-07:00

"Life is most profound when we can give up the need to know what happens, the need to have an answer, or even to form the perfect questions." Leeza Gibbons

WORDS AND ACTIONS BY BARBARA

2010-04-21T01:49:00.000-07:00

"IF YOU HIT THE BULLSEYE EVERY TIME, YOU ARE PROBABLY STANDING TOO CLOSE TO THE TARGET."

IF YOUR CHILD, OR TEENAGER, IS FRUSTRATED BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT EXCELLING AT A SPORT, A SUBJECT AT SCHOOL, AN INSTRUMENT; OR IS EXPERIENCING LESS THAN POSITIVE SOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS, (WITH PEERS, SIBLING,OR PARENTS): YOU MUST FIRST INVESTIGATE THE REASONS:

IS YOUR CHILD NOT APPLYING HIMSELF? IS HE, OR SHE, NOT PRACTICING, ARE THEY BORED, ARE THEY OVERWHELMED, STRESSED. DOES THE CHILD OR TEENAGER HAVE POOR WORK STUDY HABITS THAT LEAD TO THE NECESSITY TO "CRAM", ARE THEY NOT SLEEPING ENOUGH, (LEADING TO IRRITABILITY), NOT EATING PROPERLY, (THERE ARE MANY ILLS, EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL RELATED TO POOR DIET AND SLEEP DEPRIVATION), ARE THEY HANGING OUT WITH NEGATIVE INFLUENCES, ("FRIENDS" WHO ENGAGE IN RISKY OR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR,(DRINKING AND DRUGS, AMONG OTHERS)...

IS THERE A TRUE EMOTIONAL IMBALANCE OR A LEARNING DISORDER THAT YOU ARE NOT ACKNOWLEDGING OR THAT YOU HAVE NOT CONSIDERED? DEPRESSION, BIPOLARITY, NEUROSIS, ADHD, DEXLEXIA AND SO ON.. THESE ISSUES, LEFT UNDIAGNOSED, CAN CREATE A SITUATION WHERE THE CHILD HAS GREAT DIFFICULTY LIVING UP TO THEIR FULL POTENTIAL, AND IN SOME CASES IS A FORMULA FOR TRAGEDY.

TRY TO TRULY LISTEN AND WATCH YOUR CHILD'S BEHAVIOR PATTERNS. YOU MAY NOT BE A TRAINED PSYCHOLOGIST BUT IF YOU ARE AN AWARE, INVOLVED PARENT YOU WILL RECOGNIZE IF THERE ARE CHANGES, SOME MAY BE AGE APPROPRIATE, IF YOU ARE NOT CERTAIN, ASK FAMILY AND FRIENDS, SCHOOL COUNSELORS OR CONSULT A PROFESSIONAL. GET ADVICE, DO NOT BE EMBARRASSED; THE SAFETY AND HAPPINESS OR YOUR CHILD IS FAR MORE IMPORTANT THAT YOUR "COMFORT" LEVEL

IF YOUR CHILD, OR TEENAGER, IS JUST NOT THAT MOTIVATED AND WOULD RATHER WATCH TV OR PLAY VIDEO GAMES, MAKE THOSE ACTIVITIES THINGS THEY MUST EARN! TWO HOURS OF HOMEWORK, WELL COMPLETED, FOR 30 MINUTES ON THE COMPUTER. STUDY TIME BEFORE TV!

CREATE A SCHEDULE, MAKE CERTAIN THEY ADHERE TO IT. DON'T GIVE IN BECAUSE THEY ARE BEING ARGUMENTATIVE. IF YOU CONSTANTLY BEND,, THEY WILL NEVER TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY.

CHECK THE HOMEWORK... EVEN AT YOUR JOB, IF YOU DELEGATE A TASK AS A MANAGER YOU MUST FOLLOW UP AND SEE IF IT IS DONE; IF YOU DON'T, IT IS YOU WHO HAVE FAILED TO FULFILL YOUR JOB!

SENSITIVE ISSUES SUCH AS MAKING FRIENDS IS A "KEEP TRYING" SCENARIO. TELL YOUR CHILD YOU ARE GOING TO TAKE HER TO A MOVIE ON OPENING NIGHT, OR GET TICKETS TO A SPECIAL EVENT, THE CIRCUS, A MUSICAL, OR DECIDE TO DRIVE TO A WONDERFUL NATURE RESERVE, OR A ONE TIME SHOW AT THE PLANETARIUM; ASK HER TO INVITE A CLASSMATE...OR CALL A PARENT AND TELL THEM YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THEM BOTH. IT IS A DELICATE SUBJECT, SOMETIMES KIDS SAY TO THEIR PARENTS, "BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO WITH HIM OR HER"..HOWEVER, AS PARENTS WE REMEMBER HOW THAT FELT OURSELVES. IF THE OTHER PARENT IS NOT COOPERATIVE THAT MIGHT SIGNAL THAT THE OFFSPRING IS NOT BEING RAISED IN THE MOST WELCOMING OF HOMES, AND MOVE ON TO ANOTHER PARENT/CHILD.
TRY TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH SOME OF THE PARENTS AT SCHOOL, THIS WILL HELP INTRODUCE YOUR CHILDREN TO THEIR PEERS, ESPECIALLY IF YOUR CHILD IS SHY OR RESTRAINED ABOUT MAKING FRIENDS.

STUDY YOUR OWN BEHAVIOR. ARE YOU WELCOMING? WARM, EXPRESSIVE WITH OTHERS? IS YOUR CHILD PATTERNING THEIR LESS THAN COMMUNICATIVE BEHAVIOR AFTER WHAT HE SEES AT HOME?
HAVE FRIENDS OVER, MAKE YOUR HOME A SOCIAL ENVIRONMENT; EVEN IF YOU PREFER SOLITUDE AND PRIVACY, YOU NEED TO DO THIS OCCASIONALLY. YOUR TEENAGER, OR CHILD, WILL LEARN TO RELATE TO DIFFERENT PEOPLE. THE MORE DIVERSE YOUR GET TOGETHERS ARE WITH REGARD TO AGE, ETHNICITY,RACE THE MORE ACCEPTING AND EXPRESSIVE YOUR CHILDREN WILL BECOME.
MY SONS HAVE BEEN AROUND ADULTS IN MY RESTAURANTS SINCE THEY WERE TYKES; THEY CAN TALK TO ANYONE!

IF YOU SUSPECT A SERIOUS SOCIAL ISSUE: SOCIAL ANXIETY FOR EXAMPLE, SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP EARLY

IF YOU SEE SEVERE WITHDRAWAL FROM OTHERS, FAMILY, PEERS...A DISINTEREST IN BEING WITH ANYONE; ANGER AND HOSTILITY TOWARD THE WORLD AT LARGE, SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP.

KEEP YOUR CHILD ENGAGED IN ACTIVITIES THAT THEY TRULY ENJOY. IF THEY ABSOLUTELY DESPISE THE VIOLIN THEY NOT LIKELY TO EVER BECOME PROFICIENT. ASK THEM IF THEY WANT TO TRY THE DRUMS, THE GUITAR... PERHAPS THEY WOULD PREFER DANCE OR SINGING LESSONS, OR KARATE!

AND DADS PLEASE, NOT EVERY BOY IS MEANT TO BE A FOOTBALL OR SOCCER STAR..MAYBE THEY ARE MEANT TO BE ASTROPHYSICISTS, JOURNALISTS, CARPENTERS, OR TEACHERS, AND THEY PREFER WATCHING SPORTS, OR DON'T LIKE THEM AT ALL. HOWEVER SOME EXERCISE IS IMPORTANT; TRY TAKING YOUR SON ON A HIKE AND TALKING WITH HIM (OR HER); SPEND SOME REAL TIME GETTING TO KNOW YOUR KID'S LIKES AND DISLIKES, HOPES FOR THE FUTURE, AND OPINIONS ABOUT THE WORLD AROUND HIM

"IF YOU CAN DREAM IT, YOU CAN DO IT"
Posted by For You, I Wish Your Bloom: at 12

Today's Words by Barbara

2010-04-20T16:22:00.000-07:00

The photo of the young boy's shadow reminds me of a profound quote by our sixteenth American President, Abraham Lincoln:

"CHARACTER IS LIKE A TREE AND REPUTATION LIKE A SHADOW. THE SHADOW IS WHAT WE THINK OF IT; THE TREE IS THE REAL THING."

Parents must be like strong trees for their children; the young are the saplings that grow straight and strong by example. I think of the recent tragic stories of the bullying of teenagers and adolescents that have led to their despair and suicides. These children were abused with words, and actions. I am saddened to think they did not have more strength and faith to believe in their core that they were worthy of life. and had so much potential. They were still too unformed to understand that the bullies lacked character, and were indeed heartless, cruel, and frankly, "sociopathic." The parents of the bullies and the children both need counseling, and rehabilation. I am deeply sorry for the families that have lost their children, a loss that is forever.

Today's Wish

2010-04-19T08:15:00.001-07:00

Life holds precious gifts for us, unfolding them as we call on them. All are treasures, yet there is one immeasurable in value to the heart. This gift is living within the essence of all women, regardless of age or if she has given birth or not, the gift to nurture, to value, to bestow maternal love. I ask, but what is a mother? She is the one who lifts you when your heart is dragging, the one who finds you when you have lost you, the one who stands silent so you can sing. She cares for you in illness, celebrates you in triumph and encourages you in hardship… You are my friend; when I am down, you lift me up, when I am lost, you find me, and when I achieve, you celebrate me. I wish for you, my love and gratitude.

Tricia LaVoice

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-16T17:42:00.001-07:00

"I walked in the truth of the morning air, a tear drop in one eye, a sparkle in the other. My thoughts dominated who I was so I slowed my breath allowing my heart to lead and there I found you with me."

Today's Wish Action by Barbara

2010-04-13T09:59:00.000-07:00

The spoken word is the greatest gift. Just say how you feel. Think about the joy and comfort they receive from your words, rather than your possible feelings of awkwardness if you are not naturally an expressive person. Practice words of love and support.

Today's Wish

2010-04-12T07:16:00.000-07:00

I collected all my wishes and packed them safely with my favorite blanket. I had waited anxiously for this August night’s sky when stars would shoot across the galaxy showering the dark with light, showering me with wonder. Night fell but the sky I walked below was absent of dazzle, absent of awe where I could rest my dreams. Unanticipated fog clogged the airways foiling my hopes of seeing anything tonight but the gray. I woke to a similar morning sky and spent most of the day inside avoiding her gloom. Come dusk, I ventured to walk in her gray willing to at least enjoy the temperature she offered. Within moments of my journey her clouds parted, her fog lifted and the sun broke through streaking my face in warmth. The light graced the surrounding foliage giving birth to an array of imaginable greens. But she did not stop there, she continued decorating her crystal sky blue landscape in shades of pinks and orange tranquilizing me with her beauty as if she were trying to make up for the gray she smothered me in the night before…First, I cast my eyes to the ground in remorse. Then, I lift them to meet yours in truth. I place one hand on my heart to open my soul and reach the other to you in loyalty. My words are few but I speak in sorrow and ask for your forgiveness. For you, I wish to say, “I am sorry.” Tricia LaVoice

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-10T20:28:00.001-07:00

"This day I gift you with silence. Take it and hold it close. Listen to your dreams unfold; hear the twinkling of the stars. The marvel is yours, see it, feel it."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-09T06:16:00.001-07:00

"No longer thinking it is you when someone knocks at my door, no longer thinking it is you when someone places a flower on my table. I have grown with only one question left unanswered, only one questions left leaving me naked standing in my puddle of tears. And that is, “don’t you miss me too?”

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-08T09:49:00.000-07:00

"Focus on success and reaching goals but take care of your fellow stars, without true friends your life will become as hollow as a dark sky, the only light shining dimly from the cities below. I wish for you the gift of being a true friend."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-07T09:44:00.000-07:00

"I am lost. I am lost because I know you are hurting, your heart has been broken and I cannot mend you. I would write you a lullaby if it would help you sleep, but I know your grieving mind does not rest. I would write you a sonnet if it would help you heal, but I know you must walk with your pain for now. I sit here tonight lost with how to mend you but I wish you love, the love that comes in friendships and you, my friend, are so blessed with so much."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-06T17:55:00.000-07:00

"I look back to my darkest days and I see you at my side, I look closer and I hear your words soothe me; I look even closer and I feel your arms around me. You were there for me when I needed you most, now it is my turn to be there for you. I cannot restore your broken heart; I will not toy with empty words of a bright side or look for purpose in your loss. However, I will stand here next to you even when miles apart, and never abandon you."

Today's Wish Action

2010-04-05T08:33:00.000-07:00

"We all move so fast these days that many times we are misunderstood or misunderstand someone we love. Feelings are not meant to be hurt but they are and many times we put up walls to defend ourselves never seeing how we contributed to the interaction. Today, step back from a hurtful situation and look at it with new eyes. See if there is reason for you to say, "I am sorry" and do just that. Remember not to attach any, "but" or "you made me feel" and just deliver a beautiful heartfelt apology." Barbara Lazaroff

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-04T15:05:00.000-07:00

"Love has broken your heart but it is only love that can restore it."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-03T06:47:00.000-07:00

"Never forget what you learned being a child when becoming an adult, remembering the most important lesson of all; your legs will carry you on your journey but your family will carry you on their back."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

"Our hearts remain loyal in every moment to sustain our bodies but it is our souls that remind us in every moment that we are alive. For you, I wish the beauty of your soul."

Today's Wish quote

2010-04-01T09:03:00.000-07:00

"Place your anxious mind at my feet and I will settle you in love, place your broken heart at my door and I will mead you with silken loyalty, place your hand in mine and I will show you what it means to never let go. For you, I wish a place at my door."

Today's Wish quote

2010-03-31T05:36:00.000-07:00

"I am calling on the angels to send you a special one; one to protect you and guide you. May her arms wrap around you in times of sorrow, may her eyes follow you in precarious situations, may she rest upon your shoulders in times of love and laughter. I am calling on all angels and wishing them to send you an angel, a special angel just for you."

Today's Wish quote

2010-03-30T08:51:00.000-07:00

"Wishing you the comfort of knowing you are my rose and my heart is forever your home."

2010-03-29T17:47:00.000-07:00

For You, I Wish Your Bloom
My child, you are a bud in bloom and growing so fast. I yearn to slow the rain and sun that encourages you. Soon you will be a beautiful flower off dazzling the world far from my view. Never forget that you are my rose; if you sit on the table or rest in the garden, if basking in the moonlight or lazing in the sunshine, you are my rose. Move forward with your elegance, and remain alert, life is not always a bed of roses. There will be times when the wind and rain knock your petals to the ground, stay strong, you cannot be defeated if you are creating potpourri. Your sister roses will come in shapes and colors special for them, respect their differences and rejoice in the array of splendor you create together. Let your beauty grace the eye, let your fragrance perfume the air, while taking care not to wound with your thorns. Life may not always be a bed of roses, yet life is beautiful and you, my child, are always my rose. For you, I wish your bloom.

As we begin our week looking at this Wish, I chose this particular sentence to focus on because of its vital importance. As a mother of four, three of them teenagers, I find the most important element that keeps me going is that I was raised with unconditional love. I lost my mother when I was thirty-one years old. As a young mom, newly married, I still needed the love and guidance of my mother. Over the years when I have stumbled, questioning my decisions, I wished so many times to have my mother with me. Although, I never questioned what she would say to me. I knew her love and thoughts from hearing it all my life. Unconditional love lets us know we are worthy, it hammers away feelings of insignificance, failure, and self doubt. Knowing we are loved unconditionally allows us the safety we need to feel secure enough to leave our comfort zones and take risks, to make mistakes and know we are still loved. Life will challenge us all and in today’s world, when so many women are in the work field, family life is even more challenging. Motherhood does not care if you are sitting home watching TV all day or working as a surgeon; motherhood put the same demands and pressures on all mothers. Something has to give and it is usually the time we take for ourselves.
There have been countless times over the years that I just needed to cry and hear my mother’s voice telling me how wonderful I am, and encouraging me to keep going. To hear her tell me how proud she is and what a great job I was doing with my own children. Since my mother spoke these words to me so many times growing up, I can replay them in my mind when I need to hear her. This inspires me to speak out loud to my daughter and tell her how much I love her and how proud I am of her, even when I am not happy with the choices she is making. I know she knows it by the love I give her, but I want my daughter to be able to carry the sound of my voice with her into adulthood through the good and the bad. I want her to know that no matter what she does or where she does it, she will always be mine, my heart is her home.
Love,
Tricia

Follow Up Action:

Today, let your daughter or any young woman in your life, know how you feel about her by writing a beautiful note for her to keep forever. Drop it somewhere she will find it unexpectedly; either in her purse or on the seat of her car, maybe in a pocket or under her pillow. If she is living away from you, send it in the mail. The thought may appear obvious but the challenge is following through and doing it. I have a collection of letters carefully put away in a box that I have kept over the years that are some of my most precious possessions . Among them is a note of support from my fifth grade teacher, letters of friendship from my dearest friend who has since passed away, and letters of love from my mother from throughout my childhood written in her beautiful hand. Every now and then when I reread them my life feels fuller.

If you can dream it, you can do it, Barbara